What is Domestic Violence?

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Domestic Violence takes many forms - the lists below are only a small sample of abusive behaviour:

PHYSICAL ABUSE

Punching, kicking, slapping, pushing, strangling, stabbing, pulling hair, denying medication

SEXUAL ABUSE

Rape, sexual degradation, being forced to watch or participate in pornography, refusal of sex

FINANCIAL ABUSE

Taking money, denying you money for yourself and/or the children

PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE

Domestic violence in the form of psychological abuse can cause substantial long term damage. There are many forms of psychological abuse, ranging from constant criticism through to threats of future violence. Many victims live in constant fear of abuse and violence - this feeling of dread in itself is a form of psychological abuse.



Abusers often isolate their partners from people who may be able to help - such as friends or family. Isolation can also be enforced through other means such as preventing the victim from accessing employment, and by getting the phone cut off.

In order to keep control over their partners, abusers use a range of techniques. Criticisms, such as telling their partners that they are a bad mother, are a common method of maintaining low self-esteem. It is also common for the abuser to turn the situation around, telling their partner that they have caused the abuse by doing something wrong. Many abusers also humiliate their partners both in public and in private. These techniques erode self-esteem, leaving the victim believing that they are worthless, and that nobody but the abuser could ever love them.

Threats are also a form of psychological abuse. Threats tend to take place when other abusive behaviours don't seem to be having the desired effect. Threats to track down and kill the victim and/or the children are often used. Threats are also made to have the children taken into care. Abusers also use emotional blackmail if their partner decides to leave - such as crying, telling them that they will change, and threatening to kill themselves.
 
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